I've Got a Little Army

New Question:
How can we help equip you to use your gifts?
I am resetting. This question would be a great way to restructure. Start from the giver and move forward into servanthood. I don't want to be served. I want to grow, but I want to be where the people are. I want to be where I can help. And, I want to do it with somebody. I am tired of being alone really. I am tired of being shoved in a corner until my kids grow up. I have been raising these kids for ten years. I want to train them to love and serve through them seeing me be able and willing to do so. I am not complaining here. I have many ideas and ambitions, but one does get worn out without any venue to move....
I am a stepper. I don't like to wait to have it all together. I relish in the thought that I can start walking and my God can meet me half way. That is where faith is built.
I am also an encourager. With encouragement comes admonishment too. When something is on my heart, I do not have the ability to remain silent. Or rather I could, but I feel like I am doing something wrong even. I appreciate resolve. The catch is that I will not say anything unless a person knows my heart. Unless they know me. You can not speak into someone's life if you don't share it. Ah, there is another good thought right there, to ponder for a moment. It goes back to the alone thing....
So, I am only having fellowship, and encouragement in the places where my close friends are, and they are not where I am, or at the church that I am trying to be a part of. I do not wish to stay secluded to my best of friends only. I want to interact and be changed by a whole body of believers. (PS-Even the ones that are not like me or who rub me the wrong way.)
How can I change things so that I am rubbing shoulders with my church? I can't, but God can.  For now it looks to me like I am being asked to stand still.....
To rest.