blessings or curses

What would it look like to be able to be fully truthful and truly graceful at the same time? A place in life where we could humbly accept correction and truthfully speak a warning of tripping. Where we could strive for purity and nobility and humility. Where we would be put in our place not by human words but by the word of God being lived out, spoken out. Where we wouldn't be offended by being told we are being offensive. Where support would soften our words of drawing people back in. Where we would surround each other as family with protection, but not flattery, not accepting evil in and around. And, where the voice of God would be more important than the thoughts of people. Where we pray blessings instead of cursing. And where blessing and prayer is welcome and known.
I am guilty of criticism. It comes from a frustration of grace being misconstrued. It comes from wanting to draw in family and weed out deception. It is like when my sons are misbehaving and the fighting gets out of control, and they say, "Well, he was doing it first... too.... started it.... deserved it..." Are they allowed.... are they excused from doing right just because their brother enabled them to do so? Not at all. They are obliged to be obedient to the rules that their parent set out. The ones for their safety, for their character development, for them to learn to love each other. They are each responsible for their own choices. But, they are also taught and encouraged to look out for each other. To call each other on the break in rules. To call in authority when it is really important.
So, what would it look like to curb to the Father wholly? Can we really read and live the life-giving, living-and-active, word of God, and then nudge each other on? I am so wanting to be in the mindset of blessings over curses. Of not letting human frustration that I have constantly (and that you have constantly) be an ignitor of misbehavior. Tonight I am praying for understanding, for sifting, for truth to come forward (and not of my doing), and for blessings. For strengths and giftings and God's word to be the ignitor instead of each other's actions. And for a willingness to accept curbing in me and in you. For blinders to be taken off, to fall off. For a reshuffling of family and a enveloping of people that have a oneness. I have some repenting to do too. I have been carried away by a "deserved it" kind of thought. I will be working on blessing instead of cursing. Of letting God work out the details and not taking on the worry of it all. I will say, "God said so," but then I will let God deal. I am not the rule maker, but I can point to and call on the One who is.